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Personal growth is an unavoidable chapter of the human experience. Eventually, we all reach a point in time, where we either choose to grow or are forced to grow. What no one shares is, this journey is oftentimes very lonely. There is no booklet, nor guideline, or teachings to prepare you for the challenges and heartbreaks you will face while walking the line to self-improvement. Whether you are quitting a bad habit, searching for a new purpose, or branching into a new direction in your life; personal growth is meant to be a difficult journey that moulds and shapes the new you.

My call to personal growth came during my early twenties. I had just moved out of my parent’s house, and paying bills woke me up like a bucket of ice-cold water. It was during this first independent year, that I began to wonder ‘is this what life is all about?’. While I was lucky enough to have a secure job that allowed me to pay my bills and be financially comfortable; at the end of my nine-to-five, I often felt a longing, an emptiness in my unfulfilled life. After countless robotically repetitive days in the office, and long nights spent wondering ‘What If’; I decided to take matters into my own hands and find ways to add colour to my monotonous lifestyle. I began by rethinking how I spend my time, and what I choose to spend my energy on. This meant distancing myself from social environments that no longer watered my growth. To be perfectly candid, I lost many friends and connections during this stage of my journey. There were many weekends spent alone, and even lonelier nights. Despite this, I persevered because I knew what awaits me at the end would be worthwhile.

This is the phase that nobody warns you about. The lonely phase. You are trying to improve yourself, and you slowly but surely notice some people no longer serve a purpose in your life. You have to be selfish; choose wisely who stays in your life, and who must remain at a respectful distance. You will go through lonely days, experience many heartbreaks, and challenges but this is essential to your metamorphosis process. Like a caterpillar, you will go through trial and error, moulding and shedding parts of the old you; then eventually isolating yourself in a chrysalis where you can grow. When ready, you will crack the chrysalis and emerge a beautiful butterfly.

I, myself, went through this metamorphosis process for a couple of years. I became accustomed to spending time alone. It was during this lonely stage that I rediscovered my passion for art, and started a small business selling illustrations. Embrace the silence and loneliness, it will mould and shape your personal growth.